Grati-Tuesday (on Thursday)

Although I am not a big fan of the term "dying to self"  (in my experience, it has been used primarily as a way to sound  "spiritual" but without meaning anything concrete), but insofar as it means considering other's needs before my own, preferring others in honor, and laying down my life for the benefit of others, then it is obviously a biblical idea and meditating on what dying to self might look like, is a worthy use of our gray matter. 


Anyway, I give thanks for a mom who still challenges me with things like this: 

Self-Denial

Suppose you have been neglected or unforgiven. You sting with the hurt of the insult from such an oversight, but your heart is happy because you have been counted worthy to suffer for Christ. That is what dying to self is about.

When your wishes are crossed, your advice disregarded, and your opinions ridiculed, and yet you refuse to let anger rise in your heart or try to defend yourself, you are practicing dying to self. 

When you lovingly and patiently stand face to face with folly and spiritual insensitivity, and endure it as Jesus did, you have died to self. 

When you are content with any food, money, clothing, climate, society, solitude, or interruption by the will of God, you have died to self. 

When you never care to refer to yourself in conversation, record your own good works, or desire commendation from others, you are dying to self. 

When you can honestly rejoice with a brother who has prospered and had his needs met, and never feel any envy, though your needs are greater and still unmet, you have practiced dying to self. 

When you can receive correction and reproof from one of less stature than yourself, and humbly admit he's right with no resentment or rebellion in your heart, you have died to self.


Are you dead yet?

Redemption

Redemption

by: Lori Waggoner
Honor that has been squandered

Cannot be redeemed at any price.

Stripped of that esteemed robe,

The Honorless stand exposed.

Raise the scaffold to the heavens!

Bare the shame of The Disloyal 

Who bereft themselves of dignity

For a false and fleeting joy!

The fire of noon reveals all,

Its retributive heat

Avenging the Thoughtlessly Discarded,

Drawing forth The Guilty's dross.

Onlookers gaze, gasping aloud

In contempt of such betrayal;

Quietly praising the deserving blow

Of Justice's Heavy Hand.

A new light, obscuring noon's, descends

Enveloping The Naked, and declaring,

"Though your sins be as scarlet,

They shall be as white as snow."

The crowd cowers fearfully as The Guilty
Re-emerge, Shameless. Gloriously robed.
Wielding freshly-cast measuring rods

Of iron-clad Mercy.

Name That Flower

Musical Monday: Kings Singers

Enjoy this entertaining piece by the infinitely-skilled and humorous King's Singers:

Marquee Madness

And here I always thought it was someone who followed Christ.  Silly me...

An Old Woman

I don't think I have ever in my entire life spent my birthday meditating on the coming and going of another year.  But here I sit doing exactly that.  I don't expect to experience any profound revelations as a result...in fact, I simply hope not to talk myself over the proverbial edge! 

You see, there are these wretched things we're all born with called genes. I am reminded of their significance every morning when I awaken with hips and knees that ache for no particular reason...when I experience my daily migraine...and each time a spell of vasovagal syncope strikes.  Buy, hey...it's not ALL bad, you know.  


These same genes have indelibly bound up in them the "blessing" of longevity.  

My paternal great-grandmothers were relatively young (late 70's and mid 80's) when they passed, while my paternal grandmother remains quite healthy at age 86.  But as they say in Southeast Mizzourah, from whence my maternal grandmothers hail, "Them's small taters."

My maternal great grandmother was 104 when she died, and my grandmother (her daughter...see how that works?) was 100.  Oi-vay.  

Could it really be possible that I have not yet lived half my life?  It has been a very long 46 years and I cannot even begin to imagine that I potentially have another 54+ to go!!  All I can think right now is, "That's an awful lot of opportunities left to screw up!"  And, "Thank God the years pass more quickly as we age!"

Name That Flower

Idolatry 3

In the previous post, I describe idolatry as the belief that some idea, person, accomplishment, circumstance, institution, etc. is more reliable and more able to bring me to a place of joy and rest - is more trustworthy than - the character, word and person of Christ.

 

While idolatry involves belief, that is, misplaced trust in something or someone, it also necessarily involves unbelief.  Recognizing our unbelief is crucial to unearthing and destroying our idol.  We see this played out from the very beginning of human history.

Adam and Eve believed that eating from the tree that had been denied them, and the knowledge it would provide, was more trustworthy and more desirable than the person, words and promises of God.  Underlying that belief was UNBELIEF.  They did not believe that God was providing all that they needed at that point.  They did not trust that His intentions toward them were wholly good.  They did not have faith that He knew better than they did.  They did not rest in the knowledge that He cared for and loved them completely.

I see the reflection of my own heart in that of our first parents.  Behind all of my wrong-headed trusts, lies unbelief.  I don't trust that God will take care of, protect, provide for, defend, hold, keep, satisfy, and love me.  I don't believe that "everything is needful that He sends; nothing can be needful that He withholds" (as John Newton so eloquently puts it).  And so, like Adam and Eve, I grasp for something that I think WILL provide for, defend, keep and satisfy me.  Underlying my belief that this idol in which I trust will bring me rest and joy, lurks my unbelief that God will actually bring me to true rest and joy in His inscrutable way and time.  Not trusting Him, leads to a false, idolatrous trust in something or someone else which actually has NO POWER to deliver, save, heal, restore, or bring me joy.

Sin, in its most basic form then, is unbelief...not trusting God to be true to Himself.   The antidote is to believe...to trust...to have absolute confidence in Him!  How very simple that ought to be since He has proven His trustworthiness time and time again and in the most profoundly selfless ways!!  Yet how slow we are to trust Him, how prone to forget and how quick to erect our silly idols.  

Nevertheless, He remembers His covenant for our sake and relents according to His lovingkindness...He is compassionate and gracious and will not keep his anger forever...He has removed our trangressions far from us...He remembers that we are but dust...and He delivers us from our idolatrous unbelief.  Every single time.  

"Bless the Lord, O my soul; and all that is within me bless His holy name!"  (Ps. 103)

Idolatry 2

Idolatry:  the belief that some idea, person, accomplishment, circumstance, institution, etc. is more reliable and more able to bring me to a place of joy and rest - AKA: is more trustworthy than - the character, word and person of Christ.

How ridiculous is that?!  As Christians, we know and feel the absurdity of that statement, and yet we often live our lives subtly placing our trust in someone or something other than Christ.

Isaiah (ch. 44) tells the story of a man who ventures into the woods with tools he has made himself and cuts down a tree.  In the process of doing so, his brow sweats (hmmm...), and he becomes weary and thirsty because he himself is a mere creature.  He hauls the tree home.  From one section he chops wood for a fire by which he can warm himself and cook his food.  He takes another section of the tree and carves a beautiful image before whom he falls down and prays, "Deliver me, for thou art my god!" 

We rightly scoff and laugh at this man's absurdity!  He cries out for deliverance from something he has made with his own hands!  He falls down before a block of wood!   Jeremiah (ch. 10) mockingly compares these idols to a scarecrow in a cucumber field!  They can't walk...they have to be carried!  They can't see or speak or hear or DO anything!  

Psalm 115 also mocks these worthless idols who are blind, deaf, lame and dumb.  And...the Psalmist tells us...those who make and worship these idols, will become like them!

Our own idolatries - even though we don't literally carve an image and beg it to save us - are as futile and ridiculous as the man's in Isaiah!  We creatures take good gifts, which have been created for us and distributed to us by the True God, and we fashion them with our own hands (or minds) into something we hope will save us...that is, deliver us from trouble and bring us to a place of joy and rest.  As a result,  we become as empty and worthless as the image in which we trust.

But there is hope for us!  Just as Jesus Christ came into the idol-laden culture of Israel and exposed their idolatry, so He can expose ours as well!  How did He expose them?  Israel had become like the idols they worshipped: blind, deaf, dumb and lame, so He came into their midst and began restoring their eyes, ears, limbs and mouths.    


In the same way, He can enter our lives with power to expose, heal and restore us from our idolatries.  May we, by faith, welcome Him...even follow hard after Him, seeking to merely touch the hem of His garment if only He will make us whole.

Idolatry 1

I don't know whether this is an error of culture, modernity, youth, or whether  it is a universal error of mankind, but throughout my Christian life, my perspective on sin has largely been one of sin as moral failure.  

What I mean is that I have seen sin primarily as doing what is forbidden (sins of commission) or failure to do what is required (sins of omission).  While these distinctions might be helpful for categorizing sins, they can also leave us with the strong impression that sin is first and foremost moral failure...a breaking of the Law, so to speak.

Before you panic, let me clarify something.  I am not attempting to negate the reality of God's commandments, nor am I denying that moral failure is real failure and real sin.  But again, this truncated view of sin not only leaves us with a very anemic understanding, but also promotes legalism, which either produces a smug self-satisfaction (because I see myself as keeping the Law), or it leaves us carrying an unnecessarily heavy load of guilt (because I see my constant failure to keep the Law). 

The biggest problem with this view, is that it does not strike at the root of the sin.  It is about doing or not doing.  Being or not being.  My will.  My choices.  My decisions.  But this is only the beginning and a childish, immature perspective on sin.

I would suggest that whatever way our particular sins are manifest, the root of every single one is idolatry, but we have to train ourselves to see it.  The moral failure is only the outward manifestation of an inner idolatrous belief or unbelief.

Perhaps this is not such a profound realization, but for me, as I apply it to my own sins, it presents a significant shift.  In the past, when I have looked underneath the surface of my sins, I might have recognized a failure to trust God, or a commitment to please myself, but even in that I saw primarily a moral failure to be or to do what I ought
.
Maybe I can illustrate what I mean:


Let's say (and this is purely hypothetical, you know) a mom loses her cool with her children, yelling at and even belittling them ("Why don't you"..."Can't you just"..."How many times"..."Will you ever"...?!!).   This mother has violated God's Law in venting her anger this way.  More to the heart of it, she has not treated them the way she would want to be treated, violating the all-encompassing law of love.  But in order to deal most fully with her sin, this mom needs to look further than just her failure.  Somewhere in her heart, this mom has an idol.


An idol is anything to which we look for satisfaction, joy, peace, rest.  Very often we assume "Self" is the idol, and it may often be, but we also tend to idolize ideas, institutions, ideals, or other people.  I imagine that it might have been easier to identify idols of the heart back when we actually erected shrines in our homes to gods and goddesses.  But since we no longer do that, we have to do the hard work of soul-searching.


So, back to our hypothetical angry mom.  She lost her temper because she has placed her confidence in something and it has been frustrated, leading to angry outbursts.  Perhaps her idol is motherhood itself and her ideal image of mothering is being dismantled!  Perhaps her idol is the idea of a Christian home and her efforts to create that reality are being thwarted by these hooligans!  Perhaps the children themselves are the idol and she cannot abide their imperfections!  Perhaps her idol is other's view of her...she needs to be seen as a good mom by others.   Ultimately, there is some heart commitment that has set itself up as a source of life...that which will fulfill, satisfy, bring contentment or joy.  This is her idol, and until she identifies where she has placed her expectations and her confidence...her TRUST...she will continue to deal ineffectively with her sin.


So it is with all sin.  It looks like - and IS - an outward moral failure, but the heart of it is an idolatrous trust...confidence in something or someone other than the Triune God.  And it isn't just the obvious things or "bad" things (like material possessions...) that we are prone to idolize.  It can be GOOD things...getting married, having a child, faithful children, opportunities to use my gifts, Christian education, health, friendships, marriage, talents, recognition, godly leadership, ease, intellect, success, recreation, etc.  These are things to be desired and welcomed...but not TRUSTED IN.


I don't pretend that viewing our sin this way is a simple shift in thinking that changes everything.  It can be very difficult for us to identify our idols.  Once we do, it can still be very difficult to acknowledge the truth of what we have seen...we are good at talking ourselves out of the truth.  It can be still more difficult, once we identify and acknowledge our idolatry, to destroy it.  Afterall, it often presents itself in a beautiful form which we don't want to destroy!


I am trying to learn to examine my own sin in this way.  And for reasons I don't yet fully understand, when I finally identify the idolatry behind a particular sin, I seem to more easily find freedom from the weight of it.   Maybe it's as simple as having actually repented of the REAL sin and not just the outward expression of it.  I don't know.


What I do know, is that the Lord is gracious and compassionate, and whether or not I get to the heart of my sin, He hears my confession and forgives me.  He forgives my moral failure and He forgives my idolatry and unbelief.  Thanks be to God. 

Music Monday: Sisters

Andrews Sisters

(another song from the old Reader's Digest collection)

Quebe Sisters

Musical Monday: Herb Alpert

My acquaintance with Herb Alpert stems back to my childhood non-TV days.  For entertainment, we'd gather round the console stereo and listen to the only secular music we ever owned: a Reader's Digest Vinyl Record Collection which shall remain unnamed...but only because I can't remember its name!

Here were two of our favorites: 

Spanish Flea

Whipped Cream

Had these come in their original album covers, we would never have been allowed to listen to them, so thankfully they were "masked" in the Digest's ugly brown slipcases.  

Enjoy!

Do Not Fear

I was awakened by an extraordinarily loud, long and violent thunderstorm in the wee hours of this morning.   In that drowsy state of half-wakefulness, snippets of Psalms and hymns passed through my head.  You know, the hymn about the mighty voice of God which breaks the cedars of Lebanon.  And the Psalms which speak of Him hurling his arrows and thundering from the heavens.

These thoughts flitted through my mind during a particularly fierce roll of thunder, and I felt a sense that standing in the presence of this God, whose voice alone invokes such power, would be utterly terrifying.  Then...I promptly fell back to sleep.

This morning, upon waking, I questioned whether I take God too lightly.  How else could I experience such a majestic and fearful display, yet dismiss it so easily?  But you know what I concluded?  This is an appropriate response for a Christian!

Our God IS awesomely terrifying in His power.  And yes...we are weak and sinful, and we ought to feel the import of that somewhere along the way.  But only briefly.  It is good, right and beneficial that our primary and most lasting response, even to His power, should be one of confidence and rest!  We ought to be certain enough of His goodness to us in Jesus Christ to believe wholeheartedly that all that wrath and power were already absorbed by The Son on the cross when He gave Himself up for us.

Because I am in Christ, I can be faced with and awed by that fearful combination of God's holiness and His absolute power, and yet be at complete peace about the prospect of facing Him.  

Thanks be to God for this Unspeakable Gift.

Scrub

Scrub

by: Edna St. Vincent Millay

If I grow bitterly,

Like a gnarled and stunted tree,

Bearing harshly of my youth

Puckered fruit that sears the mouth;

If I make of my drawn boughs

An Inhospitable House,

Out of which I never pry

Towards the water and the sky,

Under which I stand and hide

And hear the day go by outside;

It is that a wind too strong

Bent my back when I was young,

It is that I fear the rain

Lest it blister me again.

And The People Were Silent

Inhumane.  Barbaric.  Entirely incomprehensible.

AND THE PEOPLE WERE SILENT...  

We should give thanks for Alexander Solzhenitsyn, who risked his life and broke the silence to record and publish The Gulag Archipelago, an account of his and other's experiences of 20th century life in the USSR.

It absolutely blows my mind that torture and murder occurred on such an incredibly massive scale, with very little attention or opposition, in my lifetime.  (I suspect my children may feel the same horror 40 years from now when reading personal chronicles from the early 21st century.  Perhaps not...but it seems we never know the full scale of human barbarity until decades later.  Are we just that good at closing our eyes and turning our heads away from hard truths?  After all we know of history, can we still not bring ourselves to believe such atrocities are happening now?  Or are the evil ones just that good at masking their evil deeds?)

I mean no disrespect to men such as Frederick Douglass or Olaudah Equiano when I say that the abuses of the African slave trade, which rightly appall us, pale in comparison to the grave and excessive abuses of power in The Soviet Union.  The unnatural death toll estimates range from 20,000,000 to upwards of 100,000,000 during this time...but remember, these numbers don't include all those SURVIVING victims.

AND THE PEOPLE WERE SILENT...  

Millions and millions and millions of men and women  were subjected, without evidence or cause, to some of the most grotesque living conditions the human mind can imagine or endure.  Torture and executions were standard fare, but sometimes offered welcome relief from the rot of daily life. 

Some of the hardest accounts for me to read were of daily life for these prisoners: just enough "food" to keep the body alive...the misery and pain of dehydration...the confusion and disorientation of continually interrupted sleep...the stench, disease and bugs from no bathing for months...50+ bodies (most of whom had soiled themselves repeatedly) crammed into a space that holds 18.  And these details only touch the basic physical conditions they endured.  They experienced continual mental and psychological abuses as well.  Most of these prisoners were very ordinary people...not powerful, not brilliant, not wealthy or successful, not posing any obvious threat to those in power...just ordinary folk living simple lives with their families and neighbors.  Until they were "chosen."

AND THE PEOPLE WERE SILENT...

I am profoundly amazed at the ability of the human spirit to undergo such inhumanity while maintaining hope!  Hope that they will live.  Hope that they will eventually be free and return to a normal life.  Hope that one day justice will be done.  

I urge you to read The Gulag if you haven't.  I confess I found it tedious at times...especially the first 3-400 pages.  So, pick it up and start with Chapter 10, if you want: The Law Matures.  You'll miss something of Solzhenitsyn's wisdom and the big picture, but trust me, you'll get a pretty good idea of the heinous crimes committed against millions of our brothers and sisters, you may be less inclined to turn your head away from reports of current atrocities, and more inclined to speak up.  And I can guarantee that your view of your own "sufferings" will be significantly altered!

Name That Flower

Musical Monday: Three Pickers

I am a perpetual sucker for the banjo, the mandolin, the guitar, and tight harmonies.  Put them all together, and I am in musical heaven.  

This video brings together 3 musicians whose accomplishments on their respective instruments are legendary. 

Earl Scruggs - banjo

Ricky Skaggs - mandolin'

Doc Watson - guitar

Wordsmith Wednesday

Root:

satio (v) - to fill

Derivatives:

satisfy, satisfaction, satisfactory

sate, satiate, satiety, satiability, insatiable

saturate, saturation

Grati-Tuesday

Today I am giving thanks to God for a mother who is willing to continue parenting me at age 45!  She is always at the ready with a listening ear, an open mind, a compassionate heart and, when appropriate, with wise counsel. 

I really don't know what I'd do without her.

Name That Flower

Musical Monday: Stacey Kent

I first found Stacey Kent through a recommendation from i-Tunes...and what a find she was!  Though many of her recordings are in French, her album The Boy Next Door is entirely accessible to us English-only speakers.  This number is from that album:   

The following is an offering from Breakfast on the Morning Tram:

Check her out and ENJOY!

Grati-Tuesday

I am thankful for men who have devoted their lives to teaching.  

This school year, my boys' lives have been enriched by their male teachers, who have not only inspired and challenged them academically, but who have also taken the time to build relationships that helped keep them grounded and secure.

However tough and independent they may appear, teenage boys need to know that they are cared for, especially by the men in their lives.  The teaching profession demands much and offers little in return (in terms of both money and gratitude), so I give thanks to God for those who have extended themselves beyond the duty of teaching to the grace of loving and relating to my sons.

Musical Monday: Sentimental Schmaltz

You probably know me as a self-proclaimed despiser of Christian music that is emotional, schmaltzy, or sentimental, either in its lyrics or its style.  My prejudice is partly due to associations but, I confess, it's also partly due to arrogance.  Afterall, I am too intellectually astute to be sucked in by such flagrant, shallow appeals to my emotions!

Or not.

Truth be told, I can't stomach this kind of music as part of a Sunday service, but in other contexts, if I drop my guard, I can be quite moved.  And here I am admitting it publicly!!  How humiliating!  Guess I'm not so high and mighty afterall...and I really do have a heart of flesh.

For those of you who are like me, try not to "analyze" these songs as either a musical or theological snob...just relax and be open-hearted.   You might even enjoy them!   And...you might not.  (Rule #1: IGNORE the multiple key changes!)

I have been encouraged by both of these lately - the lyrics are actually rich,  and I thought I'd offer you the chance to EXPERIENCE the same. 

O Love That Wilt Not Let Me Go

A song of God's faithfulness and the hope of the resurrection 

How Great Thou Art

A proclamation of the majesty of God's creative and redemptive works 

I know this isn't the most recent or popular version, but this one includes the important second verse...

Hymn to God: Donne

Hymn to God, My God, in My Sickness

by John Donne

Since I am coming to that Holy room,

Where, with Thy choir of saints for evermore,

I shall be made Thy music; as I come

I tune the instrument here at the door,

And what I must do then, think here before;

Whilst my physicians by their love are grown

Cosmographers, and I their map, who lie

Flat on this bed, that by them may be shown

That this is my south-west discovery,

Per fretum febris, by these straits to die;

I joy, that in these straits I see my west;

For, though those currents yield return to none,

What shall my west hurt me? As west and east

In all flat maps—and I am one—are one,

So death doth touch the resurrection.

We think that Paradise and Calvary -

Christ's cross and Adam's tree - stood in one place;

Look, Lord, and find both Adams met in me;

As the first Adam's sweat surrounds my face,

May the last Adam's blood my soul embrace.

So, in His purple wrapp'd, receive me, Lord;

By these His thorns, give me His other crown;

And as to others' souls I preach'd Thy word,

Be this my text, my sermon to mine own,

"Therefore that He may raise, the Lord throws down."

Name That Flower

Your Opinion, Please

I have two questions.  Feel free to chime in whether or not you qualify as a grammar nerd. 

#1:  What's wrong with this picture?

#2:  Do you suspect the error was missed by editors or intentionally overlooked?  Explain your reasoning.  (I will share my own opinion after I hear from some of you!)

When To Say When

My youngest has tried repeatedly this school year to find a word whose definition I don't know.  Out of the blue he confidently asks, "Mom, do you know what ________ means?"   Each and every time he's convinced that this is the one that's gonna stump me.  May I very humbly say that so far, he has been entirely unsuccessful?  (OK, so maybe I failed on the "humbly" part...)

One afternoon, out of frustration, he burst out, "Are there any words you don't know?!"  I assured him there are LOTS and LOTS of them.  In desperation, he grabbed the dictionary off the shelf and chose a random word.  Although I had never heard it before, I thought I detected some Latin roots and took a stab at it, coming close enough that he considered me right and moaned in frustration.  That, my friends, was the end of that little game.  The child finally figured out when to say when!

But...apparently, said child's soul was not satisfied, because he inherited an indefatigable competitive gene from his mother and maintains his desperate desire to conquer her in some way.  So these days, his challenges have nothing to do with language and everything to do with brute strength.  Hmph. (cheater!)

Each time he throws the gauntlet, I initially refuse...but usually end up giving in. (Yes, I am still a sucker for a double-dog-dare!!)

It just so happens that when I accept, The Dad just so happens to be waiting subtly in the wings, camera-in-hand, so he can document my thoroughly feminine feats for all posterity.

"Hey, Mom.  I bet you can't squat this tree trunk." [he demonstrates]

"I'm sure you're right, Son."  [long pause] "But...I think maybe I can.  How many reps?"  *SNAP*! 

In a skirt even...sheesh!!

"Hey, Mom.  Watch this!"  [he proceeds to shoulder-press the kitchen table]  "Think you can do that?"

"Oh no.  I'm quite sure I can't."  [very long pause]  "But...........perhaps I can."  *SNAP*!

"Hey, Mom.  Think you can beat me at arm wrestling?"

"Ummmmmmmm...NO."  [perpetual pause...during which child gloats with triumphant "Gotcha!" grin]

I mean c'mon!  Look at this:

Then look at this:

Yeah right.  I too know when to say when! 

Wordsmith Wednesday

Root:

animus (n) Latin - mind, breath, spirit

Derivatives:

animal - a being with a mind, breath and a spirit

animate - to infuse with spirit

animosity - a spirit of opposition

pusillanimous - small, weak or faint of mind

unanimous - of one mind

inanimate - without breath/life

equanimous - of an equitable or placid spirit

magnanimous - large-spirited

animadvert - to turn one's spirit away from

Feel free to contribute!  There ARE more!

Name That Flower

Musical Monday: Doc Watson

One of the guitar greats:  Doc Watson



My Favorite Album: Foundation

Just My Luck

Yesterday morning, I pulled into my neighborhood BP, noting that gas was $3.859 per gallon.  (What's up with that 9/10ths thing anyway??  Does 3.859 really sound so much cheaper than 3.86?  I mean seriously...). 

I chose my pump, went through the whole debit card swipe thingy and then remembered that this is their one pump that doesn't work with debit.  So...I hopped in my car and pulled around to the other side of the building to start over.  As I got out of the car, I glanced up and saw that the sign had changed to: "$4.099"!!!!  ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!!  In the 30 seconds it took me to switch pumps, gas increased by TWENTY FOUR CENTS PER GALLON!?!?  

Oi-vay.