So get this. This afternoon I show up at school to pick up my darling son, Eric - you know, his school isn't exactly on the way to anywhere, so I had to go out of my way to get him - and I'm promptly greeted with, "Oh, thank you, Mother Dear, for loving me enough to drive all this way to pick me up!" Yeah right. Try this:
ERIC: Hey, Mom. Can you maybe not wear that hat when you come to school to pick me up? Or could you take it off when you're in the parking lot?
ME: (long, uncomfortable silence followed by) Are you...serious? I didn't even get out of the CAR!
ERIC: I know. It's just...uh...it just kinda looks like an engineer's hat and my friends might think you're weird.
ME: Are you embarrassed by my hat?
ERIC: Well...yeah...sort of.
ME: Wow...here I was walking around all day thinking I looked young and hip and stylish. Instead, I look silly enough to embarrass my son whose friends might catch a glimpse OF MY HEAD through the windshield and think he has a weird mom. Wow.
I know. We're supposed to take pride in humiliating our children, right? But it's not like I have a fashionista teenage daughter who can advise me on "What NOT to wear." I could be way out of the loop here and not even realize it! IDK. This is what his friends would have seen:
I know. I know. Crazy. Embarrassing. Weird. Humiliating. Here's the whole outfit:
Please tell me I don't need to feel ashamed about the hundreds of people who passed me today and did a double-take. I thought they were admiring "the look" when instead they could have been thinking what my son was thinking..."What was SHE thinking?" "Too old to pull that one off." "What planet is SHE from?" "Get a life, Lady."
The child apologized later in case he had offended, hurt or bothered me by his remarks. Sorry? Hmph. He's just looking for an invitation to the dinner table tonight. I know how they work, these kids.
At least now I know what to wear to his first wrestling match...
14 comments:
I think your outfit is cute. And, I looked on-line, and it seems like that "conductor" style hat is all the rage in women's fashion for this year.
What does a 13 yo boy know about what what looks good on his mom any way?
Lori this is hillarious. I think you look great but I'm so out of fasion. I'm already trying to figure out how to at least get into the 21st century for the sake of my son. I mean its one thing when you're 28 and have a kid. When he's a teenager maybe you have a chance of being slightly hip. But when you're 40 and have a kid?
I'd sew a R/R symbol on it and THEN pick him up. LOL
I think it's cute.
Susan
Wear the overalls and get a train whistle. When you pick him up, toot the train whistle and say "all aboard". Joanie
Hooped silver earings and a little bling bling on the side of the hat, He's 13yrs old...at that age anything we do or wear or say tends to make them cringe....wear the HAT!!
Jennifer, I informed my son that, according to Mrs. Horne, conductor hats are all the rage...he couldn't get past the word "conductor" - "see, Mom, I told you!" Whatever.
Laura, just give up. You'll be...55/56 by the time he starts driving? There's no hope, dear. :-)
Nice to hear from you, by the way! We haven't talked in a while. I'll stop by your blog today (which I only do about once a month to catch up!). Hope all is well with you guys!
Susan and Joanie - lovin' the ideas, girls! He needs to see HOW MUCH WORSE it could be, right? Experience some REAL embarassment!!! You're both devious...just my style. ;-)
Thanks, Trina. Got the silver hoops already...but you should SEE the ones I'm wearing in the photo. Way cooler than silver hoops. They're "double-deckers"...or whatever. There's a front dangly earring, but the back guard ALSO has an even longer dangly. OK. Bad description...you just have to SEE them!
Lori, I think it's a super cute outfit. I would totally wear it and be proud of it. I think it will be easier for me since I have two daughters....Eric's response is not at all surprising to me. It's something I would completely expect from a teenage boy. It cracks me up. So sorry there is not more estrogen around your house. You're welcome at mine any time.
Sarah! Hey, darlin'! Yeah...I probably have enough estrogen for all 4 of us.
BUT...coming from YOU (I apologize in advance to all you 40-somethings, whose comments I am about to disparage), that is a HUGE compliment!! You know, since you're young and hip and all, it MEANS something!
Hope all is well with you and yours. Let's get together before the New Year...ya think?
you look ridiculous, old woman.
What did I see when I stopped by but the comment above sent by "anonymous." Let it be noted that it's not from me. I may have thought it, but I didn't send it. :-)
I knowed it was you, Rhonder.
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