Eulogy of a Stubborn Servant

At age 87, Grandma is probably  nearing the end of her days.  She may surprise us all and eek out a few more years, but recent events (including a stroke a week ago Sunday), have weakened her considerably.  Her spirit is resolute, but she is physically frail and has lost a slight edge mentally.  

She will be released from the hospital this afternoon - for the third time in 10 days - and she's determined to return home and maintain her independence.  She has acknowledged some limitations, but isn't quite ready to rely entirely on others.

I visited with her this past Sunday and again for a couple hours this morning.  She continually blesses my heart.  Today she recounted for me all the opportunities which have arisen in the last 10 days for her to declare the goodness of the Lord.  She has challenged and engaged her children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, hospital staff and fellow church members, reminding us all of the Lord's faithfulness, sovereignty and goodness.  She has encouraged and blessed me in ways she doesn't even realize.

This isn't out of character for Grandma.  Though she hasn't always been verbally bold, her life has been a continuous example of service and repentance and submission to very difficult circumstances.  

My Grandaddy was a truck-driver, often absent while their 4 boys were growing up and much of the parenting was left to her.

Her 5th child and only daughter, Riesa, was born with Down's syndrome and autism.  Riesa's early days demanded around-the-clock care...she could receive sustenance only by way of hourly feedings from a medicine dropper.  She refused the doctor's advice to immediately institutionalize Riesa.  Those days were only the beginning of a lifetime of sacrificial service which enabled that daughter to thrive.  Riesa learned to read, spell and tell time.  She learned to love music, to have a sense of humor, to play without being too rough (that one took a while!!), to care for many of her own daily needs, to obey.  She also came to know The Gospel and she memorized Scripture and hymns. 

But Riesa wasn't Grandma's sole concern.  Although she now admits and regrets neglecting her boys, whom she saw as whole and unneedy compare to Riesa, she did care for others.  Through the MO foster program, she took in 2 abused girls (sisters) with varying degrees of mental retardation.  Lily was with them from age 12-18, and Jackie from age 10 until she married in her twenties!  G'ma mothered them and now grandmothers Jackie's 2 children. 

But that's not all.  She also took in and cared for her mother and her mother-in-law in their old age.  For years, she served them 3 homecooked meals per day, made their beds, did their laundry, read the Bible to them, took them for drives in the countryside, bathed and dressed them, etc.  I lived with her for several months during these caretaking years and never heard one grumble or observed a complaining spirit about any of it.

I also remember a difficult time in my family's life when she opened her home to us.  All eight of us lived with her for a year!!  A son, a daughter-in-law, 2 adolescent boys and 4 teenage girls.  Oi-vay.  Give the woman a halo...NOW!

During the several times I lived in her home, it was commonplace - once her chores were complete - to see Grandma sitting on the sofa with her Bible open.  She has long loved and revered the Lord and His Word and she has endeavored to pass that love and reverence on to her 6 children (including Jackie), 14 grandchildren, 40 great-grandchildren and, if given the opportunity, will do the same for her 2 great-great-grandchildren.  

Now...for the record:  Grandma isn't perfect.  Far from it, in fact.  She is quietly stubborn and often insists on having her own way.  Her independent and somewhat cynical spirit made it very difficult for her to trust and love her husband well (though they celebrated 60+ years before he died in 2003).  Her self-sufficient nature often makes her resist advice in favor of her own opinion.  But, on some level, these same qualities contributed to the toughness that allowed her to serve sacrificially and tirelessly.

I want to look upon her sins and faults graciously, with the hope that those who love me will return the favor when my end draws near and they look back to evaluate my life. 

Grandma's trust in the work of Christ and in his unfailing love for us even in the small details of life, is unwavering and I thank God for her exemplary life and a godly heritage.