Better Late Than Never

Like the rest of you, I was a little bit busy on my mom's birthday...too busy, in fact, to write about her.  You see, she, like her own mother, was born on Christmas Day.


I don't often write about my mother.  Maybe it's TOO personal (yes...there are things I DON'T tell y'all!!).  She and I have a very close relationship which has morphed over the years through all sorts of mountains and valleys.   Here are a few of the things I appreciate most about her:

UNSELFISH:  Mother is a multi-talented woman, but while we were growing up, she directed all her talents toward our home.  We were often without monetary resources because she and dad gave up the luxuries of life in order to provide a Christian education for us, but she never complained about what she didn't have and she worked to make the most of what she did have.  She was an excellent housekeeper (clean and organized).  She was a  creative and frugal cook.  She was a hard worker.  She was artistic.  She was hospitable.   BUT...she also had an active, intelligent mind...and gifts that lay dormant because all her energies were directed toward her husband and six children.  After  we grew up and left home, we began to see facets of her that we never knew existed while she was cooking, cleaning and carpooling!  We had only known her as mom...not as entrepreneur, or student or teacher or writer, etc.   I appreciate that she willingly and sacrificially set aside her own agenda for our sakes.

TRUSTING:  I graduated from high school and left home 2 weeks later to head to Chattanooga...a place neither I nor my parents had visited and where we had no connections.  At the time, I didn't think it was strange for my mom to let me go without much ado...nor did I realize what it must have required of her to hear me talk about my adventures in Chattanooga...or to know that I was driving back and forth from STL alone time and time again.  But she didn't hold me back, she didn't insist that I stop taking risks, and she didn't lecture me!  We've talked about these things in more recent years and I realize that every time I went rapelling, or made that drive, or entered a new relationship, she had to exercise a great deal of faith and "give me back to God" over and over and over again.  She had to let me go and trust Him with my life.  And she's had to do that in many ways since then!

RESPECTFUL:  Over the years, my system of beliefs has undergone significant shifts, and this may have been the most troubling of all circumstances I've put my mother through.   She has always been a student of God's Word and so it mattered to her what I believed.  And think about it.  As a parent, you pour your beliefs into your kids with an expectation (or at least a HOPE) that they will "buy into it" and follow you.  When it matters immensely, any variance can be a hard pill to swallow.  I gave my mom LOTS of hard pills to swallow.  BUT...she stayed with me...never rejected me...and listened to me with respect.  We eventually came to see that our commonly held beliefs are the most significant ones, and are sufficient to keep us in unity.  I appreciate that she didn't reject me for my difference of opinions and that she loved me enough to foster that mutual respect.

WISE:  Mother has been a wise counselor for me and a godly sounding-board throughout the years.  I have navigated some fairly rough waters in my adult life and she hasn't left me to sink, nor has she spurned me when I've entered those storms by my own choosing.  She doesn't "tickle my ears" by any means - that woman calls a spade a spade - but at times when she could have thrown up her hands and walked away because I am too stubborn or because I have brought shame upon her or for a dozen other reasons, she hasn't!  She has remained close and has patiently guided me through.

I thank God for my mother.  I haven't intentionally set her up to sound perfect.  She wasn't/isn't.  BUT...she recognizes, admits and confesses her faults, as any good Christian does.  And she really did - and continues to do - so much RIGHT.  I am blessed by her and I am thankful for the way her birth and life have changed the world.  I love you, Momma.