But What Will I Wear?

Those of you who know me well will automatically hear that post title in the voice of one of my favorite comedians, but this question, as I am asking it today, couldn't be more serious.

"What is his problem?" I wondered aloud.  But that fleeting remark wasn't enough.  Nope.  Not for me, the All-Wise-One.  I couldn't let it go and had to carry it over into car conversation.  I asked my  youngest son, "What is So-and-So's deal??  Every time he loses a match he gets ridiculously angry and cries!!  I mean, c'mon!  If you're gonna be a high school wrestler, it's time to cowboy up already!!"  I kept some of my ugliest thoughts to myself.  What kind of parents and coaches allow that to continue?  Sheesh...glad MY kid doesn't do that...how embarassing!! Ya-da, Ya-da, Ya-da...

At the next meet, it's So-and-So's turn again.  I wince, roll my eyes, then lean over and whisper to my dad about what a big baby this kid is..."cries when he loses," I say, my voice thick with condescension.  Suddenly, I realize that I don't know all the moms sitting around me and hope I was quiet enough not to have been heard by anyone, especially this kid's mother.  I was worried enough to ask my older son, "Do you know what So-and-So's mom looks like?  Are any of these her?"  His answer: "No...he doesn't have a mom...his mom died about a year ago."

And there I sat.  Exposed.  Naked.  Clothed in nothing but a finely-crafted, lavishly-adorned Robe of Foolish Arrogance which I have spent years creating...and which everyone else can see right through. 

Immediately I confess.  I repent.  And...I cry like a baby.  Will I never learn?  Will I never stop playing The Fool?  Will I never stop passing harsh judgement on people and circumstances about which I have no knowledge or understanding?

As my emotions and sense of shame settle, I thank God for the mirror that has just been set in front of me and I plead with Him, no matter how painful it is, to keep putting that mirror in my face...until I no longer walk away and forget what I've seen...until I loathe my pride enough to throw that Robe of Arrogance in the fire...until I have adorned and clothed myself instead in a robe of Humility, Grace and Compassion.